Why women have affairs?
Speak about a loaded topic that no one wants to speak about, that’s it. Funny thing, affairs have been going on since millennium. Extramarital affairs can be filled with problems, cause misery, and other problems. Also you must wrap your brain around all the other issues, there’s that truth and sincerety matter, money, age dissimilarity, faith upbringing, remorse, and on and on. I suppose there will be some strong opinions about some of this.
For the purpose of this post I shall define an affair as a long term, maybe years long relationship of a sexual nature between two people of whom one or both are married to other persons, discreet wives dating.
Why do men have extramarital affairs? There are as many reasons as there are men seeking affairs. I suppose generally though it is only the human condition, the need for liking, belonging, to be wanted and cared for, the caring for others and wanting to be loved and loved. Here are a few explanations I have run across.
Naturally we as human beings are all sexual creatures. Nature has us set up to reproduce, to have sex. Sex is pleasing and exciting, and sex makes us flee the real world for a brief period of time. This euphoria exists for whatever amount of time we are able to keep the adrenalin levels elevated enough. Someone can turn the craving on and off, some are excellent at controlling it and others are so-so at best. Though we all have it, young and mature, able bodied and not so able. It is the Human condition. For some of us it is the sex act itself that drives us. For some of us it is the excitement of the chase. For some of us it is the seduction, for some it is the caring for another person, for some it is the desire to be appreciatedloved, for some it is the total romance thing. These needs and yearnings can be so strong they rise above the taboos the world has erected against married dating. For lots of individuals the yearnings will beat their doubts and make them risk the rage of not only their relatives, but society also. So why, what is the mechanism?
Sex Addicts, possibly some of us are. Sex is very good, better then drugs, a natural high. If you are in this group of physically driven sex addicts and can find away to have an affair and not injure your family or anybody else? You will need to minimize the risk you are taking. If you have the approach that a good affair is one that is beneficial to everybody, then good luck.
No love at home, or no romance. I think this is the biggest group, colossal in fact. There are many couples whose marriage is over, but they are comfy in the way they live, and upsetting the extended families is not on their list of things they wish to do. You love your spouse but there is no romance. Then there are the children to look after. Your finances are so entwined. You need the medical insurance, and so on. There are a lot of reasons to live as a family besides love and sex.
Physical reasons, there are some people who can not have sex. They have physical reasons that stop them implementing the sex operation, at least not with their spouse. An marital affair occasionally solves the trouble while keeping the marriage intact.
Ignoring, sadly this is a frequent reason I fear. One or the other, generally the man is sexually neglecting his lady for a multitude of reasons. As a male I really am thankful to you guys neglecting your ladies and making them obtainable to us men of romance, making them “milf wives” Though I still think it is despicable that you are neglectful. Also there is the spouse who is neglectful until the wife or husband has an affair, then they condemn them for doing so, when they where the catalyst. Those who neglect, then condemn, are not only neglectful, but malevolent.
Something is just omitted in the marriage, I can not put my finger on it, but its not there. Probably its romance that is missing, maybe it is a lack of love, could be caring is gone, maybe it is the closeness, maybe neglect. Maybe we have simply developed distantly, our common interests diverged. Could be it is that what I want, and what I want to do the rest of my ages, is opposite of what you want. Could be I just don’t know what I want from the marriage anymore. Could be, just maybe I miss that emotion that when I am with you, it just feels right.
The ultimate reason people give is, they look for the passion that is missing and so very much longed for.
There are other reasons, the feeling of power, to run off, for economic gain, for payback and so on. I am sure there are more reasons why people have affairs then these. I only stop because if this gets too long no one will read it.